Jolie Kerr

Keep Tall Boots from Slouching with Binder Clips | Lifehacker

SOME THINGS:

1. THE PHOTO HERE ILLUSTRATES THE USE OF FLIP FLOPS TO KEEP TALL BOOTS STANDING UPRIGHT

2. THE POST IS ABOUT THE USE OF BINDER CLIPS TO KEEP TALL BOOTS STANDING UPRIGHT

3. THE POST DOES NOT INCLUDE THE VERY IMPORTANT INSTRUCTION TO PLACE A PIECE OF FOAM RUBBER BETWEEN THE BOOT AND THE BINDER CLIP TO KEEP THE BINDER CLIP FROM DAMAGING THE BOOT

4. I AM YELLING TO KEEP FROM SCREAMING

5. [ALL THE EXASPERATED SIGHS]

Source:

Help! I Buttered My Car!

Whoop! Squalor is back on — I hope you enjoy it, but more importantly please donate to Roseann’s fundraising site to help her on the road to recovery after Monday’s bombing.

justsayjolie:

Roseann’s Recovery Fund | GoFundMe

Roseann Sdoia was seriously injured in Monday’s bombing; please consider donating to her recovery fund. Roseann is the best friend of my friend and former Bain coworker Dawn — this is what we mean when we talk about Boston being a small town dressed up in city clothing.

Hey gang, quick update on Boston Things: because of today’s goings on, Squalor will run on Deadspin on Monday rather than today. That column will include a link to Roseann’s fundraising site, but in the interim I’m making it available here with a request that you donate if you’re able to do so, along with asking that you share the link on whatever social media platforms you use.

I spoke to my friend Dawn yesterday, and she said that Roseann is in very good spirits, and that President Obama visited with her at MGH during his trip to Boston. 

My thanks to all of you for your generosity and prayers for Roseann. xoJK

justsayjolie:

You guys.

Oh my God, you guys.

Okay so! You know how generally I’m really nice about the cleaning stuff and I just want us to get our things looking nice and then sing Kumbaya together while we watch our panties spin about in the laundry and maybe enjoy a nice glass of wine with ice along the way? Yes, you know that. But I’m reminding you of it now so you’ll forgive this very bossy outburst I’m about to burst out:

THIS STUFF. YOU MUST ALL GO BUY THIS STUFF RIGHT NOW. (I bought mine in a grocery store in Delaware because when I travel I like to come home with souvenirs. But I will scour New York for local sources. Maybe even artisanal sources. Ha ha no I won’t do that.)(Also by ‘New York’ I mean ‘Manhattan’ because Brooklyn probably thinks stains are, like, cool and authentic or some such bullshit.)

I used a teeny tiny lil’ bit as a spot treatment on a brand new shirt my fiancé bought himself as a reward for sitting through Catholic Marriage Lessons and then promptly soiled with an ink stain. ANYway. His attempts — at my direction; don’t worry, he doesn’t go into these things without consulting with me — to remove the stain proved futile, so I instructed him to leave the shirt with me for proper care and feeding. I put a teeny little bit of this stuff on the stain and by the time I went back to try to find the other stains he’d directed me to seek out THE STAIN WAS GONE. I hadn’t even laundered the shirt yet.

I REPEAT: THIS STUFF TOOK OUT A SET-IN INK STAIN WITHOUT THE BENEFIT OF LAUNDERING. GO BUY IT IMMEDIATELY.

Okay I will stop being so bossy now. Sorry. I’m really very, very hungry. (The wine helps the hunger.)(But maybe not so much the yelling and general bossiness.)

I’m so hungry I posted this on the wrong blog.

Creating: Kevin Giddings, the Queen's Chimney Sweep, Comes Clean | WSJ.com

This entire thing is an utter delight, but this!

To be sure he has reached the top of a chimney, Mr. Giddings asks customers to stand outside the house and confirm they can see the top of the brush peeking out from the roof.

Everyone else is imagining Queen Elizabeth outside the palace shouting, “A bit higher, Giddings! No, still a bit higher!” yes? Yes.

How To Clean Your Roller Derby Pads and Make Your Computer Less Gross | Squalor on Jezebel

Against Womansplaining: The Problem With Advice By and For Strangers | Wendy Kaminer, The Atlantic

Yeah well screw you too, Wendy Kaminer. (Psst … your home is probably filthy.) 

Help! What Can I Do About My Stinky Feet? | Deadspin

This week, as promised, Deadspin’s version of La Squals took on the subject of rank feet and grungy tennis whites.

EVERY SINGLE THING ABOUT THIS

Is your limp hair in need of a boost of volume? When you’re low on your go-to arsenal or volumizers and root lifters, laundry starch can do the trick for a strong hold that lasts throughout the day.

Yeah … you know what, Good Housekeeping? I’m just not sure I’m with you on this one.